YIN YANG

By Prerna Chandra · Tue Feb 24 2026

Most of us grow up believing that to be taken seriously, we need to be consistent. Clear. Predictable. One thing at a time. So we learn to read rooms early and adjust ourselves accordingly, bringing out the parts that feel acceptable and tucking away the rest for later, if at all.
In some spaces, we lead with strength and decisiveness, keeping our sensitivity on a short leash. In others, we soften, accommodate, and stay agreeable, quietly negotiating our boundaries so we don’t seem difficult. Over time, this switching becomes normal, even responsible, until we realise how tiring it is to keep choosing which version of ourselves gets to exist.

What exhausts us isn’t effort, it’s self-editing.

The constant belief that being soft will dilute our authority, that resting will cost us momentum, that holding boundaries will make most of us grow up believing that to be taken seriously, we need to be consistent. Clear. Predictable. One thing at a time. So we learn to read rooms early and adjust ourselves accordingly, bringing out the parts that feel acceptable and tucking away the rest for later, if at all.

In some spaces, we lead with strength and decisiveness, keeping our sensitivity on a short leash. In others, we soften, accommodate, and stay agreeable, quietly negotiating our boundaries so we don’t seem difficult. Over time, this switching becomes normal, even responsible, until we realise how tiring it is to keep choosing which version of ourselves gets to exist.